Following a Path You Cannot See

Two years ago, I left my marriage. It was a huge transition out of a nearly 30 year relationship. I had met my ex when I was 19 and we were married when I was 22. I had never had a long term relationship with anyone else, I had never lived alone, and I had never had to support myself financially. All of these factors had probably led me to stay longer than I should have. But let’s face it, when you are fully in a situation, we don’t always even see that there are other ways to exist. Leaving was just not something that ever crossed my mind as an option.

One day, after a particularly stressful situation, I knew it was time to think about what a different way of living would look like. Financially, we were struggling as it was. We had debt. I couldn’t even imagine how I could possibly live outside of our shared resources. Until I did. In meditation, I would begin to ask for guidance and imagine what it might look like. I began to see that maybe it was possible. I couldn’t see all the answers or all the variables that would have to fall into place. I was being asked to have faith. My inner guidance was speaking to me and the message was – you are safe, you will be guided, but you will be only given information on a need to know basis.

This was frustrating because it was a giant leap I was making into the unknown. I wanted clear answers on how it was going to work. I toiled over this for some time and then finally Spirit had said to me – it’s time. 

I still had no clear answers on the hows but I rolled with all ups and downs that September, desperately grasping onto my surfboard, as the shockwaves of this decision at times almost drowned me in my own tears. Time and time again, I would come to my center channel. I would look at the outline of picture that I had imagined and slowly, bits and pieces began to take a more defined shape and color. I kept asking for guidance and when no answers would come, I sat patiently and waited. Don’t get me wrong, it was HARD. But I did it. And the guidance and outside support did come, eventually.  And in ways I never would have imagined.

Of course, situations like this are as unique as the individuals in them. This is not post advocating any one thing in particular aside from developing an ability to connect to your center regularly, so that you will be able to establish solid communication with your inner guidance system and, ultimately, lean into trusting it.

The trick is, you have to be steady about it. You can’t wait for a crisis and then expect to the level concentration and connection to just spontaneously appear. So, I guess this post is advocating one thing in particular. Begin now, to commit to a regular meditation practice. Start small and be consistent. Even if it is lighting a candle each morning and taking 3 deep breaths. Start now, so that when a day comes that you need to find that steady place inside of yourself, you will have already cleared a direct path.

Sending you much love,

Sri Devi